Skinny lives matter
Skinny Girl Problems Are Real
Plus a skinny girl feeling good about her body shouldn’t make you feel bad about yours
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While it’s considered rude to comment on a fat person’s weight, most people take pleasure in pointing out how thin someone is. When I was around 10 or 11, I almost drank a whole bottle of Apetamin because I was so tired of people telling me how skinny I looked. I was fed up with people telling me I needed to put on some weight to look beautiful.
Apetamin is a weight gain vitamin syrup supplement that helps you gain weight by increasing your appetite.
That afternoon, I heard that my uncle was coming to town and I was so happy to see him. I just couldn’t wait. When he arrived, I run to meet him. As soon as he saw me, the first thing he said was that why am I still so skinny. He asked if I’ve been eating at all. As a young child, I was so upset and confused. I was tired of family members always telling me to put on weight as of something was wrong with how I looked. I had a fast metabolism. I ate a lot but I couldn’t seem to gain any weight. I wanted to gain weight so badly because I thought being skinny was bad.
I went to my mother’s room, dug for the syrup because I knew people took it when they couldn’t eat, and then they’d eat so much and gain so much weight. They also slept so much! I remember drinking a lot of it — more than the normal dosage hoping it’d speed up the weight gain process. I slept for 16 hours straight and I can’t remember much from then on. I’d wake up drowsy every now and then and see my mother sitting by the bedside worried sick.
Most people would never walk up to a big girl and tell her that her weight is a problem but many people see no issues suggesting a skinny girl needs to put on some weight in order to look acceptable.
People take pleasure in pointing out that skinny girls need to eat more so they can look better. And that’s rude!
We always get reminded that we’re skinny as if we don’t already know it.
Some People Are Born Skinny Not by Choice
As a skinny person, my daughter is also skinny. I know the self-esteem issues I suffered as a little girl so I'm always watching out for her against those who may make her feel bad for being on the smaller side.
Last year Thanksgiving, I had dinner with some friends and one of the women looked at my daughter and said to me that we need to figure out a way to put some weight on my daughter and she shoved some food into her mouth.
I thought oh hell no!
In my head, I thought, “The only thing we need to figure out is how to reduce that gigantic ass of yours that's dragging the floor.”
That's my daughter we were talking about so my ego jumped in quickly! I didn’t say it out loud because if I did the whole dinner would have been ruined and I would have been the bad guy.
We don’t say things like that about others because we are nice people.
I explained to her I'm a small person and it's no surprise that my kid is also small and that she perfect just the way she is and nobody will bother her about her weight! And nobody would force her to eat either.
When I said that I've always been small, another woman chimed in and said, “Wait until you get older. You are going to get bigger when your metabolism slows down.” Then she told me her story of how she used to be so skinny and is now heavy.
It was like telling me that I look good now but I should look forward to days when I will look very different. Compliment? Not really!
Some people are born big. Some people are born skinny. Some are born skinny and become they become big while others are big and become small. But no woman should be made to feel bad about their size.
People take pleasure in pointing out that skinny girls need to eat more so they can look better. And that’s rude!
Skinny Girl Problems
Not many people understand that skinny girls have just as many issues as bigger girls and when we have issues about our weight they are just as valid. The skinny girl's problems are real.
People really think we are starved. We have to prove to people that we eat. And when we do eat, the whole table’s jaw drops. They are now surprised I ate the whole bowl of fufu.
And worst, when we arrive at a family gathering, all the good portions of the food are gone because people don’t think we need to eat. We can’t survive on oxygen alone, you know?
If you don’t eat a lot people have something to say, if you eat a ton people have something to say.
Another problem the skinny girl faces is the struggle on windy days. Have you ever had a battle against the wind? It’s hard to not get blown away and unless you find a pole or something heavy to hang on to, you’ll be flying with the wind.
People enjoy picking us up just for the fun of it. No matter the occasion, we get picked up by people who want to see how strong they are and how light we are. That wasn’t what they meant when they said sweep a girl off her feet!
Then they grab our hands and put their thumb and index finger around our wrists just to emphasize how tiny we are. Again we already know!
And then there are those who straight up tells us being skinny is unattractive. They say things like, “Only dogs like bones,” “Real men want meat.” They say we need some meat on our bones in order to attract a man because men like curves.
Others point out that our ribs are poking out. Being skinny may be unattractive and so is being mean and rude!
In Africa, when someone is very thin, people assume they have a deadly disease like AIDS and you’ll hear people gossip against the skinny person’s back. It’s quite sad. People constantly ask the skinny person if they’re doing okay because they are worried about their appearance.
To be skinny you must be starving, sick, a drug addict, depressed, or unhappy with your life. Not because of an amazingly powerful metabolism so they try to fix the skinny person by offering unsolicited advice.
Most girls who are skinny from childhood actually wish they’d gain a little weight but some girls have a fast metabolism and no matter what they do, they can’t gain any weight.
If You Have Any Insecurities as a Skinny Girl, Good Luck.
Every time I tell my friends I need to exercise, there’s always someone to look me up and down and ask me, “For what?”
When I complain about the fold of belly fat I need to get rid of, my bigger friends show me their excess belly folds in an attempt to cancel out my problems.
People assume if you’re naturally skinny then you must always feel 100% happy and content with your body because fat girls wished they had a body like yours. And if you’re even being slightly unhappy with how you look, it's selfish and ungrateful.
They hint that the skinny girl's problem is nothing compared to the problems of a bigger person so they silence us.
And if you have any insecurities about yourself, you must shut up about them and keep your issues to yourself because there are women with real problems.
People assume if you’re naturally skinny then you must always feel 100% happy and content with your body.
Skinny Does Not Necessarily Equal Healthy
You can be naturally skinny and still want to live a healthy lifestyle or get in better shape. You can be skinny and still want to go running or go to the gym every day and that shouldn't be questioned or judged.
Former Pretty little liars star Shay Michelle got fit as a skinny girl and received some backlash after she shared her own before and after photos to Instagram showing off her four weeks of progress after using a fitness app.
2020 was the year of searching for something to make us feel good. Not even good…to feel fine. Feel ‘normal.’ For me that came in the form of comfort food, comfort clothes, and throwing my fitness routine out the window. And that was OK…for awhile. They’re called unprecedented times for a reason.
But I also learned about physical and mental self-care, and made a pact with myself that 2021 would be different. I wanted to focus on myself gain, because I’m the best version of myself for Atlas and everyone one else when I take care of myself first.
#4WeeksOfFocus is exactly what I needed. A doable time frame 30 minutes a day for five days a week for four weeks. A clear start, a clear finish, and something that I could totally commit to. I have loved getting up these four weeks and having a routine and a challenge to start the day. I feel more healthy, energetic, and engaged…which makes me a better me. — she captioned the photo.
Although many of her fans were happy to see her progress, the other half accused her of flaunting and exaggerating her already amazing body. Not only were some of her fans disappointed with the star for her partnership with a fitness app which the post went around to, but several comments also insinuated that she was being inconsiderate because there are so many big women who would feel bad about their bodies.
“You were literally skinny stop portraying normal weight as obesity,” a fan said.
“Before and after photos are super triggering to some people. Something to keep in mind,” another chimed in.
You are not triggered until something needs healing. Triggers point you to the wounds that need your attention.
We don’t promote skinny? Wow! What do we promote then? Because it certainly isn’t obesity. This guy is insinuating that skinny isn’t healthy. Pressure on women? The actor posted a photo of herself which had nothing to do with how other women feel about their bodies. You are not triggered until something needs healing. Triggers point you to the wounds that need your attention.
We must all love our bodies whether big or small and another woman feeling great about their bodies shouldn’t make the other feel bad about themselves.
The reason we spread things all over our page is that it belongs to us and we can do whatever we want. And again, no woman should feel bad about their bodies because another feels good about theirs.
There’s nothing wrong with gaining weight. There’s nothing wrong with losing weight. She never said anything about fatness being negative. And she didn’t say skinny is all that matters. She wants to be skinny and that should be acceptable.
Final Thoughts
Women of all shapes and sizes are subject to judgment and scrutiny based on their bodies. Sadly, no matter your body type, you are not immune from hurtful comments about your appearance.
Society must get over what real women should look like and stop feeding into this cultural idea that there’s only one universal beauty standard we should adhere to.
Women come in all shapes and sizes. Some women are born with curves and they’re beautiful. Others? We might not have curves at all but we’re still beautiful and when we have problems, they are very real and valid.
It's rude commenting on a big girl's weight and it’s equally rude commenting on a skinny girl's weight.
